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It’s Our Fault, Not the Kids

I’m getting fed up with the “Kids these days” stuff going around the Internet.

We snark and snarl about them being addicted to video games, having no ambition or drive, having low frustration tolerance, you name it.

I’m telling you right now, that if you’re over 40, it’s not the kids’ faults. It’s yours.*

You bought into a culture of fear that never let your children or the children around you take a risk. You taught them that failure was too painful to tolerate instead of teaching them to deal as part of life. You taught them that following the rules and being good at tests was going to make them successful, when there has never been a truly successful person in this world who did it by the book. Not one.

You got too frustrated with them making messes in the kitchen, so you didn’t have them cook with you. You didn’t think they made the bed neatly enough so you didn’t teach them to clean for themselves. So, tell me. Who has the low frustration tolerance, if you couldn’t stand the mess involved in teaching your kids to be grown-ups?

Yeah…

 

 

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* I’m well over 40; this is on me, too. No high horse.

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Repost: How to Enjoy Turkey Leftovers

turkeyleftovers-1There you are you are faced with leftovers from that enormous bird you bought for Thanksgiving and you just don’t know what to do. You like turkey well enough, but good heavens, you don’t want to eat the same thing for a couple of weeks. Neither do you want to waste.

There’s a secret to enjoying turkey leftovers and I’m going to pass it on to you.

Now, my husband and I were all for a non-traditional Thanksgiving meal, but our son was pretty insistent that we have the traditional meal of turkey, dressing and pumpkin pie. So, being the mean, cruel and overbearing parents we are….

We had turkey, dressing and pumpkin pie.

I’d bought a couple of small pie pumpkins around Halloween, had used one for pumpkin bread and pumpkin muffins. We cooked the last one for the pumpkin pie and had about three cups left over. Some of that is likely to find its way into a soup, but I am seeing pumpkin muffins in our future as well. My son has now learned that making something from fresh pumpkin is pretty easy – chop it in half, scoop out the guts, bake it about an hour, scoop out the cooked flesh and puree. Easy peasy. Nuttin’ wrong with using canned, but we just happened to have a pumpkin sitting there.

Because of my habit of being a tightwad, I had considered buying a turkey breast instead of the whole bird. But at price per pound, the whole bird was an enormously better buy. Even though yes, a 12 pound bird was a bit much for the meal, I know how to make good on leftovers, boy howdy let me tell you what. Even so, we don’t want to get sick of eating turkey, do we?

What’s the secret to enjoying turkey leftovers?

The secret to not getting sick of turkey as a leftover meat, however, is to repurpose it in very flavorful dishes. Sure, sure, a turkey sandwich is delicious, as is turkey salad. But it’s just as easy to use those leftovers in other meals that aren’t quite reminiscent of the American white-bread meal that is Thanksgiving dinner. You want spices. You want strongly-flavored veggies. You want differences in color, presentation and texture.

The bones are going to go for stock, oh yes! If you’ve never tried turkey stock, give yourself a treat. It’s delightfully flavorful and enhances any dish where you’d use chicken stock. We’re not going to do Carcass Soup this year, tasty as it is. Instead, we’re going to use the turkey to make a few freezer meals. We’ll be doing turkey burritos (my family are crazy for burritos), freezing up some bags of diced turkey for stir frys or the (sorta) Puttanesca, and freezing up some bags of diced veggies and turkey for some delicious soups.

Except for the (sorta) Puttanesca, these are great freezer meals as well.

Turkey Burritos

2 ½ c. Turkey chopped fine 1 can chopped green chili peppers
2 t. cumin 1 T. minced garlic
1 small onion, chopped 2 t. pepper
1 t. salt 12 8-inch flour tortillas
1 can refried beans 2 c. shredded cheese (preferably cheddar or a mix of cheddar and Monterey jack)
Sliced Black Olives Salsa
Sour Cream

Preheat oven to 350 and grease large pan.

Sauté turkey with chili peppers, cumin, minced garlic, onion, salt and pepper.

Spread tortilla with ~2 T refried beans, add ~ 2T meat and 2T cheese. Fold sides of tortilla in, and then roll tortilla, being careful not to roll too tightly and tear burrito. Arrange all 12 in pan, and bake at 350 for ~20 minutes. Serve with salsa, sour cream and gorilla nostrils.

If you intend to freeze them, skip the baking wrap well and freeze. When you intend to use them, defrost and freeze according to directions.

Turkey (sorta) Puttanesca

2 ½ c. diced turkey ¼ c. black olives, chopped
¼ c. pitted green olives, chopped ¼ c. chopped onion
1T chopped garlic 1 medium bell pepper, chopped
1 6 oz. can tomato paste 1T capers
2 tsp. dried red pepper 2 tsp. oregano
1 tsp black pepper Dash salt
3 T olive oil

Set aside turkey breast. Combine all other ingredients but the olive oil and tomato paste. Mix well and let sit to let the flavors marry a bit. Sauté the turkey breast in olive oil, then add the olive, pepper and spice mixture. Sauté until the onion is translucent, then add the tomato paste. Turn to low and cook for about fifteen minutes. Serve over pasta.

Turkey Pot Pie

For pie crust:

2 c. flour 1/3 c. shortening or butter
1 t salt 1/4 c. cold and I mean icy water

For Filling:

2 ½ c. shredded turkey, cooked 2 ½ c. mixed veggies (or one can of Veg-all)
2 cans of cream of mushroom (or celery) soup.

To make the Pie Crust:

Combine salt and flour. Cut in butter or shortening until fine. Add cold water slowly until a stiff dough is formed. Divide dough in half. Roll each half in a 12″ circle. Use one circle to cover the bottom of deep 9″ pie plate. Do not trim edges.

For Filling:

Combine turkey, veggies and cream of mushroom soup. (Gosh, that was hard, wasn’t it?). Dump it all in the pie dish, cover the mess with the remaining circle of pie crust dough, fold the edged together and pinch together around the edges. This is a chance to make it look pretty, if you want. Cut a vent for steam to escape in the top of the pie. (I usually use a fork to poke the words I and You in it and cut a heart out in the center –nauseating, ain’t I?).

If you intend to freeze it, wrap well, label and do so. Then defrost and cook for about 1/2 hour at 425 o or until a nice light brown. If you don’t intend to freeze it ahead, just cook it according to previous directions.

Turkey Curry

2 ½ c turkey, diced 2 medium potatoes, diced
1 c. milk 1 c. plain yogurt
1/4 c. raisins 1/4 c. cashews
1 c. peaches, mango, or apricots 1 15 oz can coconut milk
Olive oil for sautéing 1 large onions
3T garlic 3T sliced fresh ginger
4 T curry powder 4 T. spring water

If you intend to freeze for later, toss all the ingredients but the coconut milk in a gallon freezer bag and freeze flat. When you want to serve it for dinner, defrost, toss in a crock pot for 6-8 hours and serve over rice.

Otherwise, toss in crock pot for 6-8 hours. Serve over rice.

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Cargo Scarf and Purse Freedom

cargoscarf-1A friend of mine pointed me to the cargo scarf as a possible project some years ago. I’d always intended to make one and I guess tonight was the night.

I love scarves and wear them all the time. I also do not particularly love purses, though I do carry them. While I like pockets, the reality of women’s clothing is that if you buy it, you often cannot find any with good pockets.

This is an excellent compromise.

This is just a very long scarf that you can wrap around your neck (or drape around your neckline in my case, as I do not like anything close to my neck) and just wear as if it is a normal scarf. The pockets don’t show on the outside.

The instructions in the link I give encourage you to make custom pockets to fit the gear you intend to carry, which I did. I have a pocket for a phone, keys, iPod Nano, and thin wallet.

I was dubious, but after I tried it on, I really like this. I have some jackets and skirts that have no pockets, so the idea that I can have a scarf that’s essentially pockets makes me unutterably happy. It drapes well, and lies neatly. You’d never guess that the scarf has stuff in it when you wear it.

It was fairly easy to make. You’ll want to buy basic 45″ fabric – half a yard in your fashion fabric and half a yard in your backing fabric. The original instructions encourage polar fleece or some other warm fabric. I just used quilting cotton, as I’ll likely wear this indoors quite a bit. Then you just design patch pockets for the gear you want to carry. I suppose given that it is two layers of fabric, you could do welt pockets, but I then the outline of your stuff would show through the single layer of fabric, I think. As it is, it’s hard to tell you’re not wearing just an ordinary scarf.

The original instructions also called for making a pen holder and adding a d-ring for keys. I was uncomfortable with the key on the outside design, so made it with a pocket for keys, instead.

What I didn’t do, and I’m going to have to go back and do, is have pocket closures. I think I’m merely going to get some iron-on Velcro to hold the pockets shut, but you could design the pockets with almost any closures you wanted.

It’s also comfortable to wear. While I do own some pocket intensive jackets of various sorts and love them, I also like this as a purse alternative. I expect I’m going to make several to suit various outfits I have.

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Modern Medicine

needleIn the fall of 2012, I had a peritonsillar abscess.  This is an extremely painful bacterial infection of the tonsils. Think strep throat gone wild and partying in a single tonsil.  You can’t speak clearly, you can’t breathe well, and swallowing is incredibly painful.  Treatment?  You slice open the tonsil to let the infection drain, then give the patient antibiotics and some reasonably heavy duty pain drugs.  If you’re lucky, this treatment is on an outpatient basis, but people are often hospitalized due to complications.

It is painful enough that you welcome the relief of the incision, by the way.

It used to have another name – quinsy.  While it can still be fatal, people die of it less frequently than they used to.  (Elizabeth I and George Washington are thought to have died of it).

While I do think modern medicine has its problems, I get upset at people sneering at it.  I really, no kidding, would be dead by now if it weren’t for modern medicine and antibiotics.  That peritonsillar abscess was the most recent of a series of infections (I used to be prone to strep) and illnesses that I’ve never really mentally tagged as serious.  After all, I got better, didn’t I?

But looking at them from the lack of modern medicine perspective, and friends, I’m quite lucky to be alive.

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The KonMari Report –Six Months

Okay, I think I am going to have to refute Marie Kondo’s claim that once you go through the house according to her method, you’ll never be untidy again.

No, my house is not particularly a mess. My bed is made, my clothes put away, the only laundry that isn’t put away is either in the laundry basket waiting to be washed, in the washing machine being washed or is currently drying in the dryer (yes, I’m doing laundry this morning).

My drawers and closets are still neat, sure enough. But I do have a craft project on the dining room table. There are dishes in the sink because I need to empty the dishwasher (I think my husband ran it this morning before he went to work. Thanks, sweetie!)

There is a napkin on the arm of my chair.

Is my house messy? Maybe by Ms. Kondo’s standards, but I can’t think of anyone else who might think so.

So, no. The house is not perfect. I do not empty my bags and purses the second I get home every day. I have a gym bag (emptied of sweaty or wet stuff, true) sitting on a rocking chair in the jungle room. I’ll be filling that to go do my swim in a few minutes, so I am fine with that.

Does this mean I think that Marie Kondo’s method didn’t really work?

Goodness no!

I am very glad we did it. We really did keep only what we use and makes us happy. I have plenty of storage space for my stuff now, and it is easier to put things away. That means I am generally quicker to do so.

I think part of the problem was a simple one. It doesn’t look that dramatic because in general, the house didn’t look too messy to begin with. We recycle properly now, and have a place to put recycling because we cleaned out the mudroom properly. We have a nice place to store cleaning supplies because we cleaned out a junk storage place properly. The changes are less dramatically visual and more centered around the fact that we don’t waste house room on things we don’t use and love.

Do I ever look in a closet or drawer and ask myself, “Does this spark joy?”

Totally. So I weed a little bit every now and then just on a routine basis. I’m quicker to toss the pen that doesn’t write well, or the makeup that doesn’t really please. It does keep storage under control.

But that little bit at a time stuff? That’s FlyLady habits.

It was a thought I was having as I was comparing the two methods, and I think we’re getting into a “right tool for the right job” situation.

For a massive declutter, you need the big shovel. That’s absolutely the Konmari method. Hands-down, I think it is better for the Big Declutter.

For daily maintenance? FlyLady. The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up doesn’t address maintenance at all, and I think that’s a big hole in the process. She claims you’ll just naturally stay all tidy. I’m not so sure about that. Don’t get me wrong. The reboot was wonderful. Having good storage space and a big, dramatic change in how much I had was great. It is hard to put something away when you have nowhere to put it. I agree wholeheartedly that expensive storage systems are silly. I did buy a charging station for my bedside table for my devices, and I really love it, though.

But the Konmari method presumes you’ll magically maintain this. I’m don’t. Not really. I have to think about it. I do scans of the house to see that things are put away. I don’t get up and put things away the second I am done using them. I put it away the same DAY, which is certainly fine, but I do have to clear off flat surfaces that are collecting stuff like mail, packages and general detritus from the dailiness of life rather than putting it away immediately. I really think that the habits of dailiness and daily routine that I’d been working on for fifteen odd years were what made the whole big declutter a more useful thing. It’s been years since my house has gotten more than fifteen minutes worth of messy, barring a party or something.

I may get to things a little quicker than before. I’m less tolerant of my surroundings being messy for a long period of time, so I do take five to put stuff away more regularly. But do I keep it perfect and pristine all the time?

Nope. And I’m cool with that.

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Focus and Flow

flowandgend1
I like playing on Habitica.com.

It’s cute and silly. The basic concept is that you gamify habits you want to create and keep. You can join a party and do quests to defeat monsters. You “attack” by staying on habit.

What I’m really using it for now, rather than specific habits in specific areas, is balance.

I keep my house clean. I work out regularly. My diet is as good as it needs to be.

What I am having a problem with is obsessiveness with one activity to the exclusion of others. While it’s okay to have a Major Focus, I don’t think it’s okay to let everything slide in the face of that.

A skill I’d like to develop now, and one I haven’t before, is the ability to hyperfocus not based on what seems shiny at the moment, but what needs to be done.

I knit well because I got obsessed with it for a while then went on to another thing. Same with my sewing abilities, or my skill with spreadsheets and various other things. For the most part, I think that’s okay. Obsessions can be fun and useful, and the hyperfocus I apply to them has netted me a wide range of skills over the years.

What I don’t like is when I’m focused on knitting, I don’t want it to be hard to think about swimming, or when I’m focused on weight training, I don’t want it to be hard to focus on teaching, and so on.

The skill I want to develop now is that of being able to choose to pay attention rather than randomly focusing on what seems like most fun at the time.

What, you mean like actual grown-up self-discipline?

Yeah, pretty much. I can do it a little. I’d like to be able to do it nearly on-demand. Yes, this article is part of that — writing my 750 words every day!

The problem is that I feel like my time is so often chopped into little pieces. I’m fine with context switching from time to time, but it’s really hard to get into that flow state if the phone is ringing or someone is asking for my attention or help. Creation becomes hard that way. I am sure that at least in part, my focus on knitting had to do with the fact the projects I choose are easily picked up and put down. Same with my sewing.

I am also sure that’s part of why I love swimming so much, and why I resist certain types of training. That flow state is easier in the pool when you’re just swimming those long, slow distances. You swim and while you’re thinking about your stroke and balance and what have you but after a awhile, your mind grows quiet and your body just takes over and you go.

Writing is also like that when you get a large swathe of time. You write, letting your thoughts flow out into the computer. Your surroundings disappear and it’s only what you want to communicate and convey that becomes the whole of the Universe.

I adore that feeling.

It has been postulated, and I think with some justification, that women are socialized to make flow states difficult. We must have some part of our attention out for others. We cannot do anything or dive into anything that allows us to ignore the demands of others. Even when we try to break out of this, our socialization will slam back pretty hard.

Can we simply announce, “Hey I want some time to myself” and then get it?

I can.

But the ground state presumption is that I’m available mentally and emotionally for interaction.

I sometimes wonder if that is why I tend to guard my solitude so very carefully. When I am able to be fully and utterly alone is when I can do and create better. Certainly that’s why swimming holds such an attraction to me, and why the idea of training on a team holds almost none.

It’s not that I won’t get better/faster doing intervals and watching the clock and interacting with other members of the team and coaches to get feedback. Totally will. There’s no doubt at all about that. And for things I really want to do, I do need to get better/faster.

But that means it would be one more aspect of my life where the opportunity for flow is taken away.

And that does more than irritate me. It actually scares me a little.

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Run, Run, as Fast as You Can

runrun-1I was pondering on some things at the end of a long workday yesterday (as I am wont to do) and I saw some pictures of some Halloween themed gingerbread men.

It brought my mind back to a story my parents told me about when they were dating. Mom was a teenager when she was dating my father. She was experimenting with cooking (something she still does well into her sixties, I might add) and was making a gingerbread man for my father.

As she was taking it out of the pan, it broke.

Oh no. Disaster right? She’s trying to make something nice for her boyfriend and it broke.

Now my mother is totally a perfectionist. She doesn’t let that get in the way, though. Instead of trying to bake another, more perfect, gingerbread man, she iced the leg, and attached a note to it when she gave it to my father, saying that he broke his leg trying to jump out of the pan and run away.

That was an important lesson to me later on in life. Sure, sure, doing your best is important. But, an important part of being a person is to make good use of mistakes. I doubt I’d have ever heard of any gingerbread man my mother baked for my father as a teenager if it had turned out perfectly. It was the fact that she took a mistake and made it into an interesting story made it memorable fifty years later.

Do you have the creativity to turn a mistake into something awesome? If you do, what did you do?

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Day Five – At Sea

At Sea

The last day of the cruise! *POUT* We had breakfast with a couple of people who worked for utilities in Connecticut. They do a lot of cruises and really seemed to enjoy themselves. I had French toast. Peter had Eggs Benedict.

Peter was having a real problem with his sinuses combined with a massive headache, and needed to lay down a bit. So I went to the library to update this journal. Then I went up on deck and read in the sun for the rest of the morning. Yes, I love chilling in the sun and reading, so it was great. After a Dayquil and a nap, Peter was fine, which was a relief.

After that, we went to lunch. Peter had beef tenderloin with potatoes au gratin and asparagus. I actually had a hamburger and fries. Don’t laugh. That was darn near up to Beastburger levels of yum. For dessert, we had a praline trifle.

dayfiveatsea-1

After lunch, we had a class in how to decorate cupcakes. Chef Marlin, a pastry chef from Manila, taught us. I was utterly and completely blown away with his instructional skill. I am not particularly neat-handed, and am not really all that good at cake decorating, so I was a good example of someone who would be difficult to teach. When you get someone who is not confident, you teach a different way than you do when you have a student who is confident in skills. He even polled the class to get an idea of what level of experience he was dealing with in his students, an important thing when teaching a skill.

Like a great teacher, he walked us through the process step-by-step, chose a project that let us use a few easy techniques to create something really fun, and he was good at engaging the learners. As a teacher, myself, I can say this guy was good!

After the cupcake class we headed back to the solarium to loaf on the pool deck. Being the last day, we did indulge in a daiquiri by the pool. It was lovely. As we were mourning the loss of the fun, we did get an alcohol-fueled wild hare and had to rush to leave the deck for a few moments to go down to customer service.

See, the ship was going to be going to New England for its next cruise and one of the ports at which it was going to call was… BOSTON! We’d parked our car at Logan. In our addle-pated way, we figured if the first port of call was going to be Boston, maybe we could buy an extra night on the ship and just cruise until we got there. Certainly, it would be nicer than an airplane. The T goes from the port to Logan, after all!

As it turned out, Boston was going to be its last port. So, no. We didn’t have the time. But it was worth asking, right?

We went back on deck to enjoy the rest of the day in the sun. After that, we headed back to our cabin to dress for dinner and pack.

The last dinner we had a shrimp dish with rice. Peter had a garlic soup for an appetizer, and I had the minestrone. I know, weird. Our wait staff also sang Happy Anniversary to us and brought us a chocolate espresso torte for dessert.

We had a drink in a lounge, but dancing didn’t get started until we really needed to head to bed. We really didn’t want that cruise to end!

Disembarking

We had breakfast in the dining room before disembarking. It was totally smooth, as was the trip to the airport. However, in my caution about making sure we had time to make flights and such, I booked a five thirty flight. We got to the airport at 10:30, so you can imagine that we were not excited about the wait. Peter suggested seeing if we could get on an earlier flight.

As it happened, we could! Not only could we, it turned out very lucky, indeed. We got to Boston around 3:30, and as it happened, the flight we were scheduled to take was delayed and didn’t get to Boston until 8:30 in the evening. That was long after we’d done some grocery shopping, gotten home and unpacked.

Thoughts on Cruises

I love cruises, obviously. I love being on a ship.

It does amuse me, though, how much it brings out who people are. There were a lot of people who had been on the Oasis of the Seas, the first of the Oasis class cruise ships in the Royal Caribbean line. The ship is larger than the Liberty, and people were extremely impressed by that, and felt that having been on it was impressive.

I mean, don’t get me wrong, it’s a miracle of engineering! Any ship that can comfortably carry 7,000 people and keep them happy and entertained has taken an enormous amount of thought and design. That’s pretty impressive.

But at a certain point (and certainly the Freedom class ships like the Liberty of the Seas have reached it) were you sometimes feel like you’re more on a floating hotel than you’re actually sailing in a ship, if that makes any sense. The nautical experience kind of fades away some, and I find that a little sad. Though if you gave me a cruise on the Oasis, I promise you not only would I not refuse it, but I would likely have an awesome time!

It’s also funny to me that there’s a certain level of snobbery around staterooms. When Peter and I cruise, we usually get an interior stateroom. Why? Well, they’re much, much cheaper. I don’t go on a cruise to hang out in my room. I know of people who say that they’ll only sail if they can get a room with a balcony. Would I enjoy breakfast and leisurely coffee on the balcony while at sea? Of course. I’m sure it’s great. But the markup is damn near the price of another interior stateroom ticket. Don’t be foolish. I’d rather go on two cruises and skip the balcony!

I’ve also encountered a lot of misconceptions about cruising that I’d like to clear up.

The Staterooms are Small

Well, okay, you’ve got me. They’re small. Ours was about 152 square feet.

But before you freak out, how space is designed can help.

There’s a bed area where you can have twin beds or a king-sized bed, with a nightstand for each side of the bed. The nightstand has a drawer and a cabinet area and there are reading lights for each person. The bed area can close off with some pretty good darkening curtains. We found that our empty suitcases could fit stored under the bed quite well.

There is also a sitting area with a small love seat and a desk/vanity with a large wall mirror, several small shelves, and lights beside it; as well as a flat screen television. Believe it or not, we used the television. It’s interactive, so you can check your shipboard account balance, book excursions and sign up for classes right there if you don’t want to go physically to the excursion desk. The desk has about six small drawers.

There is also a closet with a safe for valuables, a place to hang clothes, and some shelving.

The bathroom is really small with a large mirror, a cabinet that closes, and a shower that is saved from feeling claustrophobic by having a curved door and a very adjustable showerhead.

The trick to living in this sort of space comfortably is, well, making sure you keep your cabin shipshape. The storage is designed to close and stay closed through any pitch and yaw you might encounter. If you put everything away in cabinets and keep it tidy, the room will not feel oppressively small. Clutter will change that, and if you’ve come with no more than one suitcase per person, you’ve a place to put everything, I promise!

The only thing you do on a cruise is eat at buffets and get drunk

There are many people who spend their time on cruises that way. I bless them, as the extra bar bills keep the price of my own cruise down.

First of all, the buffets are nice to have available when you’re too busy to dine, but they’re not the best food option on any ship. Don’t get me wrong, the food is usually good in them, but you’re missing out if you don’t go for the dining room experience. The food is better, with better presentation, and if you don’t like something, all you have to do is ask for something else. Or an extra serving of whatever you like, or whatever. They try very hard to make sure you get exactly what you want! You just have to ask.

But even though I do like the food on cruise, no-one eats all day, right?

What else is there to do?

On days at sea:

  • Hang out by the pool.
  • Take a jog/walk around the track on deck. (Our ship was four laps to a mile)
  • Work out in the gym.
  • Go to the spa and get a massage, nails done, hair done, a facial, or a million other spa type things I don’t know about because it’s not something I’ve spent much time on.
  • Attend some of the many enrichment activities. I’ve attended lectures on the running of ships, taken tours of the kitchen, gone to destination lectures, taken dance classes, taken cupcake decorating classes, as well as other things.
  • Dance and party by the pool.
  • Curl up in a comfy spot on deck or inside by a window and read.
  • Surf the Internet (Though I didn’t. It’s extra and I am paid to be a geek. I don’t pay other people to be one!)
  • Surf on a surfboard. (There’s a wave simulator on some ships)
  • Go rock climbing
  • Play basketball or volleyball.
  • Play mini golf
  • Shop. We were joking that our ship had a bigger shopping promenade than our Powerhouse Mall back home!
  • See shows
  • Watch movies
  • Go clubbing (most ships have a lot of different bars and clubs) and you don’t have to pay a fee to get in and they don’t kick you out if you’re not drinking.

You get the idea. There’s a lot to do. My problem tends to be one of making sure I get everything I want to do in rather than trying to find something to do. The ship hands out flyer every day with all kinds of info, including a daily schedule and there never seems to be enough time!

On days in port:

It depends on the port. Often there are lots of water activities to choose from. You can do anything from hang out on a beach to going SCUBA diving. You can take boat sightseeing cruises, tour the destination port, learn about the people there, go shopping, you name it. If you get bored in port, there’s no help for you!

You don’t get any privacy

It is true that ships really do have a lot of people on them. That’s for real, no kidding. You do have to deal with your fellow man. If you’re introverted like me, that can seem daunting.

The trick here is to find quiet spaces. Cruise ships have lots of them, if you know where to look. Lower decks tend to have fewer people on them, so you can get outside to stare over the ocean and look for sea life near the lifeboats and you’re unlikely to be disturbed. Ships usually have libraries, and people respect that libraries are supposed to be quiet. Each ship and each cruise is different, but if you spend your first few hours on a ship simply trying to get lost and exploring the ship, you can usually find five or six spaces where you can go for quiet and solitude.

If your idea of a vacation is to go where there are few to no humans, then no, a cruise is not for you. But you can get peace and quiet easily enough if you know where to look.

Darn it, thinking about all of this makes me want to go on another one!

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Day Four – Bermuda: Around the Island


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We got up and had breakfast in the Windjammer again — time constraints, you know. Then we got on a bus to tour the whole island for a five-hour tour.

Our guide was a K-9 police officer named Andrew Rollins. He was a mellow, affable man who knew the island very well. His wife was a fourth grade schoolteacher, and in fact had started on her first day of school this year. We started the tour at the dockyard, and he mentioned that the prison was right there, holding about 100 inmates.

Both of our guides seemed a bit annoyed with the leniency of the Bermuda prison system. While I expected that in a policeman, it was a bit surprising in our other guide.

Then we got out on the island and started moving towards Hamilton. As we did so, Andrew talked about life in Bermuda. He explained about the government, the jobs people really wanted to get (government jobs like teaching and such were considered among the best because of good benefits). He talked about how the roofs have to be white limestone, and that this is how they catch rainwater for all the island’s water needs. Each house has a water tank of their own. If they run dry, it’s about $90 per $1000 gallons to fill it up. So if a Bermudan apologizes to a tourist about the bad weather if it’s raining, they’re lying. Inside they’re celebrating their water tanks filling up.

We had a stop in Hamilton, but it was really short. We really didn’t get to look around. It’s quite a small city – probably smaller than Lebanon , NH. But there were lots of shops and things. Prices are high in Bermuda — especially the food. Everything has to be shipped in from elsewhere.

He talked about the schools and the school system. Understandably, since his wife is a teacher, he is quite proud of their public school system. He has two college age daughters and they’re going to college in England. (I used to have a friend in college at ODU — T.C., who was from Bermuda. It was interesting to see where he came from and how life was in his home. I have to wonder what he’s up to now)
After we left Hamilton, we made our way to St. George and saw a replica bermudadayfour-2of the Deliverance, one of the ships George Somers’ crew made after the wreck of the Sea Venture. To give you an idea of how insane/desperate/brave these people were, the Deliverance was only about 57 feet long, and sailed from Bermuda to Jamestown.

That was really cool. We also wandered around St. George for a bit. I was trying to find some sort of Sea Venture memorabilia, but it wasn’t happening.

After St. George, we went to St. Catherine’s beach to see where the crew of the Sea Venture came ashore. That was also something that really moved me.

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After that, we went to the Gibbs Lighthouse. The view was amazing.

All in all, we were very glad to have taken that tour, but I was quite sorry to leave. Peter and I both have fallen in love with Bermuda and want to go back — just for a trip.

We boarded the ship and hung out topside as it sailed away from the dock. I felt sad to be leaving Bermuda.

Dinner was back in the dining room (thank goodness) and we enjoyed our new tablemates. It was a mother and daughter group – Mom being a crisis communicator and daughter a designer who creates device-independent, HTML supported email from Orbitz. (Device-independent design is harder than you think! I learned that on a project last year!) Peter had the lamb, and I had the sole, but it wasn’t really all that spectacular. I think at least in part it is because my stomach was flaring up, so food wasn’t much of a pleasure.

After dinner, we hung out at the piano bar for a bit, had a Dark and Stormy, and then went to an adults only comedy show by Michele Balan, whose bit revolved around being menopausal and the annoyances of aging. I thought it was really funny. I also thought that a lot of the parents on the cruise were idiots for letting their kids go to it. Some seemed a little offended, but give me a break. If a cruise puts Adults Only on something, maybe it’s a clue you shouldn’t have your ten year old attend, just sayin’.

After that, we went to bed griping because the next day was going to be our last day. We didn’t want to think about the end of the cruise!

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Day Three – Heritage Wharf — Naval Dockyard, Bermuda

We got up to have breakfast in the Windjammer buffet before we watched the ship dock. The food is good at the buffets, but I am partial to the dining experience. We just wouldn’t have had the time to have breakfast in the dining room if we were worried about seeing the docking. And we were, so we did. While it was really windy, it was still a nice day.

We left the ship at about ten thirty and wandered around close to the ship before our Segway tour. I tell you this; the dockyard in Bermuda is really refreshing compared to the incredibly aggressive salesmanship you see in Nassau. The people are more laid back, which is nice.

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We had a blast on the Segways! It takes about ten minutes to start feeling really comfortable with them. After that, using one is just plain intuitive. You almost think you’re steering with your thoughts. We got a look at the outside of the Naval Museum, as it was closed. Ah well! They celebrate Labor Day in Bermuda just like in the States. Then we went by a moon gate and had our pictures taken. (Couples kissing under the Moon Gate is supposed to be good luck, so of course Peter and I did). Then we went out toward the old prison, and heard the history of that before our guide Deesa took the regulators off the Seqways so we could open up to full speed. At first, I was scared going on the narrow Bermuda roads, but there wasn’t much traffic. We rode by a couple parks (beaches) some cottages, retirement homes and several people who knew our guide greeted her, including her Aunty. I enjoyed how friendly, mellow and laid back people seemed to be. It is different from some descriptions I’ve heard of the place, but maybe the fact it is a holiday has something to do with it.

We stopped by Glass Beach and Peter picked up a piece of sea glass for me that looks like a dragon’s scale. Deesa seemed to be into plants and stuff, and was pointing out not only the plants but also some of their medicinal (or not!) uses. There’s a plant called “Match me if you can” that seems to be a cure for everything from arthritis to asthma on the Islands. Our tour guide the next day talked about his mother treating his asthma with it as well.

One of our party was really afraid when he first got on the Segway, and we heard him muttering the Litany Against Fear. I bit my lip but internally was thinking, “BUSTED!”

After we got back from the tour, we hung out on the ship for a bit and had a very late lunch.

Then we hung out at the pool for a bit and I got some reading in. While we would have liked to go to a beach, it would have taken more time than we had to get our stuff, walk to the beach, get back, shower, have dinner and then get to our glass bottomed boat. We’ll hit the beaches the next time we go. Yes, there will be a next time!

We had dinner at the Windjammer and I certainly ate too much and was utterly miserable afterwards. But the glass-bottomed boat tour was fun. I am glad we did it at night. We saw the wreck of the HMS Vixen — an ironside ship from the late 1800s that was sunk to try to block a deep channel. However, the bow kept sticking up out of the water, so it wasn’t as good of a trap as they’d hoped for.

We learned that while coral reefs are dying off, we’re learning that sinking iron and steel structures are very good for rebuilding them again. As iron rusts (Oxidizes) it gives off oxygen that really encourages reef growth. This technique is being used around the world to try to rebuild dying reefs.

After that, we hit the hay pretty hard.