Why I Am in Favor of Testicles for Trucks

Apparently there’s a new fad out there — hanging rubber or chrome testicles from a truck’s trailer hitch.

And because it’s (OMGWTFBBQ!) a physcial representation of a body part having something to do with <gasp!> sex, some peabrain in the Commonwealth of Virginia wants to ban them.

I think balls for trucks are great! They’re awesome. They’re a big ole danglin’ sign that there’s someone in that truck that is too tacky for me to associate with.

I mean, really… Without those swingin’ nuts, I might actually have to waste the valuable, limited seconds of my life listening to them talk to discover they’re too idiotic to be worth my time.

So if you feel the need to give your truck balls, why go for it, my dear.

And thank you from the bottom of my heart for your philanthropic service.