You know how working out is supposed to boost your immune system, and make you strong and all that smack?<\/p>\n
I have a case of the Martian Death Flu.\u00a0 You know the one, where air molecules\u00a0 bumping against your skin hurt<\/em> like crazy and your joints are on fire and you have a hacking cough and a fever that trips up and down teasing you so that you think it’s gone away until you get the shivvering chills again and your head aches and the idea of food is appalling and you feel yourself getting weaker by the hour and…<\/p>\n Yeah, that one.<\/p>\n I don’t get sick often so this is getting on my nerves.\u00a0 I want to train, but… Well, Rule One.\u00a0 I’m weak enough I’m not sure I could squat with an empty bar and keep my balance.\u00a0 So, I wait.<\/p>\n Not only that, I think it would be a bit inconsiderate to go to the gym and pass this along to other people.<\/p>\n But I’m feeling cranky and ill and moody and want a mood lift.<\/p>\n And<\/em> I have work to complete for a client.\u00a0 Thank God I’m disciplined about research and outlines. \u00a0 But writing when your think is broken and you can’t brane?\u00a0 I know there’s this famous idea of people turning to writing when they weren’t well enough for other work, but I guess I’m a crap writer. \u00a0 I write best when I’m well.<\/p>\n Oh, and open message to all you macho assholes who go to the gym and train while dripping snot into tissues and horking lung butter into your hands:<\/p>\n STOPPIT<\/strong>!!!!<\/p>\n It’s really inconsiderate.\u00a0 Just sayin’.\u00a0 Use a mask if you’ve just gotta <\/strong>train, please? (You wanna hurt your own body, go for it.\u00a0 It’s spreading your illness around to other people that’s my concern).\u00a0 I’m right up the road from a fancy, schmancy research hospital that’d be delighted to give<\/strong> you a mask if you ask for one.\u00a0 Really.\u00a0 But you can buy ’em cheap in drug stores, too.\u00a0 I know they’re dorky lookin’.\u00a0 But I’d respect it.\u00a0 Honest.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" You know how working out is supposed to boost your immune system, and make you strong and all that smack? I have a case of the Martian Death Flu.\u00a0 You know the one, where air molecules\u00a0 bumping against your skin hurt like crazy and your joints are on fire and you have a hacking cough … <\/p>\n